What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
