Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
