we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
