i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
this beer tastes like vomit already
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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