Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
