her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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