haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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