Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
