Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
