NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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