Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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