Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
