I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
