why didn't you poke me back
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
