put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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