what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
