You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
