is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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