but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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