I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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