is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
