i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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