So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize