I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
