everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Randomize
