I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize