If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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