how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
