i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
The cops high fived after they tackled you
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
