So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Don't make out with my wife yet
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
