also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
