This is not my ceiling
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
