Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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