Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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