Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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