im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
