If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
