if only i could text you this smell
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
