I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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