never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
