remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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