she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
