I just threw up on my dentist
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
