Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
