i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
