I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
