All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
