Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize