Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I smell stomach acid.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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