I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
