How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Where is the hickey?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
