last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
